Do you ever catch yourself doing something you don’t like? I am sure we have all had moments where we think, “I hate it when I do that!”
Have you been trying to shed excess weight, only to sabotage yourself with that late night chocolate binge?
Does public speaking or public performances leave you with such performance anxiety that it robs you of any enjoyment?
OCD anyone? Is procrastination holding you back?
Here is the good news for any of these issues and so much more… it’s a rogue part that is the culprit! We look at ourselves as being whole, and although that is true, the whole is made up of many different parts. Each part has its own capabilities, talents and agendas.
We have a part that experiences joy, parts that experience sadness, parts that experience learning, parts that are worker parts, parts for relaxation, parts for anger…and yes even rebel parts and addiction parts. Up to 25 different parts can be at play here.
Each part has a perfect function and believes it is doing the very best for their human. Sometimes the wrong part is playing the lead role in the conscious, we may experience chaos, confusion, anger, addictions and much more.
Let’s take the anxious performer for example. You love to perform or carry out public speaking, however when you do, you experience such performance anxiety, that it robs of you any joy, as mentioned earlier. What this means is the wrong part is in the lead conscious role for performing. So what we would do is speak directly to that part… who really does NOT want to be in the lead role, and ask it if it wants to be doing what it loves way up the back in subconscious. Of course, the answer is always yes. We then, through certain techniques, find the ‘performer part’ to take the role. No more anxiety! Problem solved.
The same goes with any unwanted behaviour. When it comes to addictions, there is obviously a traumatised part that needs to be given a voice, be seen, be heard and be given a support part and taken out of the lead role and sent up the back to the subconscious with their support part, and bring into the lead role a part that is mature, strong, capable and able to say no.
When we feel totally broken, it is a real comfort to know that it is only a part of us that is broken, and when we tend to that part lovingly and give it support, we can experience normality again (if there even is such a thing).
Of course, it sounds very simple, and it is, however there is an entire process that happens to make sure we uncover the initial trauma/issue, and really support that part that experienced the trauma/event and make sure it is truly heard.
With weight reduction, we need to speak to the sabotaging part and ask what it needs to allow their human to shed the excess weight, send it up the back and bring in a strong, mature part and success will follow.
With procrastination, there is usually a fear of success or failure. So we speak to that part, give it the support it needs and send it up the back.
So, the next time you find yourself getting annoyed at yourself for a particular behaviour or avoidance, ask yourself, “Which part of me is doing this behaviour?”.
Find yourself a good Resource Therapist from www.resourcetherapyinternational.com to help and you won’t look back. It’s the easiest form of therapy and so empowering.